3 weeks later… I know, I am a very bad girl for letting myself get distracted last Sunday and not posting a new blog 😅. Clearly was having a little too much fun! Not to worry, since there are only solutions with me, I already have a system in place to make sure next time my post still goes up when I am doing other things.

*Deep breath*

A friend recently sent me an interesting article by a therapist explaining how making assumptions can be detrimental to interpersonal relationships. When we overthink or are afraid to ask certain questions etc, it often result to us making the incorrect assumptions. I don’t know about you but I will say, I have very much been guilty of that and have been working on it. While I am still a work in progress, I quickly learned that just asking makes life much easier than the overthinking loop.
As I was reading the article, it made me think of all the incorrect assumptions made toward s3x workers (SWs) by most people including some who actively use the different services (online, in person, AI etc). Here are a few of them and my point of from my own experience/personality:

We are uneducated : Actually, a lot of us have a degree or are working to pay for our education. I personally finished school before becoming a SW. Also, it is important to remember that, there are people (in general) who have no desire for formal schooling and are perfectly fine and happy with it.
We have mental health issues : I am thankful that my mental health is good and at the same time, I feel like mental health disorders are to be taken seriously as they affect a big part of the population. There is a lot of shame around it and using this against an already marginalise group like us is very unfair.
We all have daddy issues : I had to do a deep dive on that one because I never really understood what it means. I found that said issues have to do with the relationship we (girls) had/have with our father. Mine was good. The one thing I will say is If dating someone over a decade older than me (which I did in my only 2 serious relationships and will certainly do again) is a trait of having daddy issues, then I have daddy issues 😌 I am just a girl, I love to feel protected + affection, I value financial stability, I value life experience + I am a huge sapiosexual and competency is a trait I really am drawn to. Voilà! I obviously cannot have a perfect arse and be flawless too, I would be boring my dear 🤣
We can/will never find romantic love : While it is slightly more challenging to date and openly share what we do, it is still very much possible. Also, you will be surprise by how many of your favourite ladies are in happy relationships, marriages etc. I am single, not actively dating and at the same time, open to it.
We value money more than real connection : Like you, my future self + financial freedom + peace of mind take precedent over most things, I feel it would be unreasonable for me to meet others needs and to not have mines met. But I will say that, the main reason I thrive as a SW is the fact that I do value real human connection more. In fact, when I think of all the feedback I receive, there is a very clear pattern of words used that show that I do love connecting with people.
Also, I feel like the boundaries around our relationship often make it hard/awkward to express our feelings or often say things like “I miss you” when we do but we value you more than you can ever imagine! 💘

I will stop here, for now. If I made you a little curious about something related to me, you know how to contact me. Until then more selfies 🥂

See you in only 1 week, with another “blog”!
Tendrement, Néla 💋

Daddy issues...